Many people from strangers to yearslong friends ask me to send them pictures of me. I always say no. And here’s why.
To send pictures can be a dangerous weapon
You have certainly come across numerous stories about celebrities who took intimate pictures of each other when things went well between them and used them against each other when things capsized. This alone highlights the principle that once we release our pictures into another person’s hands, we’ve lost control of them forever. Words are unreliable. People are fickle. Anyone can say that he wants our pictures only for his personal enjoyment. But people will say what they think we want to hear when they want to achieve their goal… That’s human nature. Besides, if we took the premise that someone wanted to use our pictures for his personal enjoyment, why should our pictures serve as someone’s stimulation for [especially sexual] gratification?
Pictures can be weapons of identity
Girls and women who come to the west from poor(er) countries to sell sex for x years with the goal of taking their earnings home and living like queens on them think nothing of taunting pictures of their naked beings all over the net because they have nothing to fear. They know nobody in the western countries and nobody knows them. Hence they can afford to show their private parts and faces in one picture. They cover themselves with stage names and have nothing to lose. Plus they know that after a time they’ll disappear anyway.
But people who are lawful citizens of a country and more serious about contributing to its economy for more than x years have things to lose. I am one of them. Plus I’m involved in other fields, hence the risk of me releasing pictures into the big wide world is higher. After all, one never knows what sites people I collaborate with in other fields surf in their private time! I can’t afford the risk of being spotted…
Separate journeys, conflict of interest
One of my roles is that of a commercial model. Hence I have heard men ask what’s the problem with sending them pictures of me when I’m a model. The problem is that I keep modelling and the roles I state on this site separate. If I send pictures of me to another person, I lose control of what the person will do with the pictures. He might post them on sites about which I don’t know – and even take credit for them! And the nature of those sites might damage my brand, public image, and the potential to be hired. He might sell them. Or he might even manipulate them to change my appearance to an unflattering one…
And since I never know what sites scouts for commercial models surf, I again don’t know who might see my [potentially hideously altered] pictures where… Talent scouts have good memories for faces. It would be easy to recognize me in pictures with different themes. People quickly put two and two together… which could damage my path in the world of modelling. Again, I can’t afford to take the risk.
Pictures can be subjects of blackmail
Pictures can be subjects of blackmail the same way as they can be weapons of identity. This is the absolutely worst case scenario and happens seldom. But it happens. Men who see high end courtesans usually have far more to lose than the courtesans, but if a man wanted to avenge me for some innocent misunderstanding, he could do it with my pictures. Hence keeping my pictures as much under my control as I can is always a good idea.
To send pictures can make copying easy for uncreative copycats
If you want to know how I create the pictures that you see on this site, you can learn here. The effort that goes into creating them is another good reason why I won’t send anyone pictures of me. If good artists copy and great artists steal, and if anyone with even a smartphone camera can call himself an artist these days, why should I make it easy for people who have photography as a hobby to copy the concepts in my pictures? After all, the concepts were what attracted many strangers, now lifelong friends, and perhaps even you to my site because they were different from the rest. The different stands out. The different is what you notice. So if I made it easy for others to copy my concepts, I’d be killing my differentiation. Would that be wise?
Seeing too much kills the mystery and anticipation
The women who sell sex today seem to think that the more of their naked beings they exhibit on the worldwide web, the better for their profits. But is that so? Yes, there are men who are addicted to naked pictures online. And women who post them only feed these men’s misfortune. One form of bringing light to men’s lives is to help them out of addictions, not to feed addictions! Another reason is that I don’t sell sex.
Looking at pictures online also never guarantees that the men will go see the women who post them. And then there’re men on the other end of the continuum – men who get attracted by what they don’t see, not by what they see. Sex certainly sells. But this slogan has a subtly different meaning. Eroticism always has been and will be in what we don’t see. Erotic pictures are erotic exactly due to an element of mystery, guessing, and anticipation of what is there where we don’t see…. So showing everything in bright lights kills the mystery, thus takes the eroticism out of the picture. All that’s left is a shallow picture of a naked woman. That’s hardly a big deal since the internet is full of them…
Sending pictures and videos online feeds addictions of the addicted
Another important reason why I never send pictures and don’t share videos of me online is that this material feeds the addictions of men who are addicted to viewing them. Rest assured that there’re millions of unhappy unfulfilled men who sit glued to the computers, phones, or tablets viewing pictures and videos of prostitutes, porn, and other women. As a coach who helps men OUT of addictions I’d deeply contradict my mission if I shared pictures and videos of my naked self to FEED men’s addictions, wouldn’t I?
Would you feel comfortable to send pictures of you?
So, gentlemen, that’s it. If this hasn’t sufficiently answered the question of whether I’d send you pictures of me before you ask, nothing will. My lifelong friends and supporters know well that me not sending them pictures of me is never personal. If I set a rule, it’s credible and ethical if I apply it to everyone fairly. If I don’t apply the rule equally, I’ll weaken its potency and thus make a mockery of it. After all, my lifelong friends and supporters know what I look like. And as I state on the page that displays my pictures, anticipation is the fuel of desire.
Most men of a certain calibre who have plenty to lose will agree with why sending pictures of naked nature around the world is risky. They certainly wouldn’t feel comfortably sending pictures of themselves for exactly the reasons stated here. What do you say?
